I, steelopus, vow to watch this video before any sexual encounter, in an effort to remind myself what could come of it.

frageelaytwit:

I call this one “Birth Control.” Crank to full volume to ensure complete protection.

This is what a typical morning before 7 a.m. looks and sounds like here. (The bird was with me, cowering in a corner as I slurped my morning coffee).