Stephen LopezNo; seriously. Nothing.
(via April 18, 2009)
Here’s my Spoken Wordelec entry from last night.
Hey there, do you like babies, and feet, and Bono? ^___^
Asked by Anonymous
No and no and no.
… … … … … … … … … … … . . _________
… … … … … … … … … … … . ./ It’s a trap!
… … … … … . _„,—~~~~~~~~—,_ … . ._________/
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do you definitely never want to have kids? (from what i have read in your blog, it seems like you don't really ever want kids)
if it's too personal of a question, you don't have to answer if you don't want to...
also...i was going to post this anonymously, but i figured somehow you would figure out it was me anyway with your computery ways!! :)
Asked by Anonymous
… you still asked me anonymously, which is fine, but if you ever want to reveal yourself, feel free to ask again.
As for the question itself…
I definitely never want to have kids. I’ve felt this way for as long as I can remember. Most people who are pro-children seem incapable of understanding why anyone would feel the way I (and countless others) do. It’s an argument that I’ve seen go back and forth here on Tumblr many times before, and it’s not an argument that I shy away from.
The clearest I can sum it up is this: if you are someone who wants to have kids, then I assume it’s something inside you that drives that desire. You “just know” that you want kids. It’s not a decision that you’ve made so much as it’s an emotion, or a need. It’s ingrained into your spirit and your soul.
And for me, it’s exactly the same, just in reverse. This isn’t a decision that I’ve labored over; I haven’t sat in a field pondering a life with or without children. I just know that I don’t want kids. I just know that I don’t want to have that enormous responsibility. I just know that I desire a life with the selfish-freedom to go anywhere and do anything at anytime. I just know that I have other priorities in my life.
Surely a psychologist could sit me down and analyze me an say that my not wanting kids is an underlying fear of failure or it’s a selfish manifest of my ego or it’s a fear of commitment. And most of that would probably be very true, but that in no way changes what I just know: that I don’t want to have kids.
Maybe my feelings will change in the future, but for now: I am who I am. Take me or leave me.
On today’s episode of “Lunch at McDonald’s with Steelopus”…
- Missing Persons “Words” gently falls from the ceiling speakers.
- A grandpa struggles to assemble a Happy Meal toy for his screaming grandson while a grandma continually encourages him to use the instructions.
- One of the “helpers” mops the floor around my feet while I’m eating, as I attempt to cover my salad to prevent any contamination.
- A toddler girl absolutely loses her shit when she finds a pickle on her hamburger.
- I question why I continue to eat my Southwest Salads (grilled) in the restaurant each visit instead of using the drive-thru and finding a deserted parking lot someplace where I could eat in peace and then maybe close my eyes and drift away from reality for a few beautiful minutes.
GPOYW
IN AN EIGHTH GRADE CLASSROOM STOP KIDS EVERYWHERE STOP ITS TOO LOUD STOP THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT FACEBOOK STOP ONE KID ASKED ME IF I AM SMART STOP DO NOT SEND HELP STOP THE END OF TIMES IS HERE STOP SAVE YOURSELVES STOP I REPEAT STOP DO NOT SEND HELP STOP MY GOD ITS FULL OF STARS FULL STOP
Don’t be sorry, TurboTax.
No, really. Do not be sorry.
Child Heard Directing Air Traffic
New York, N.Y. (AP) - The Federal Aviation Administration is investigating whether a child directed planes from Kennedy Airport’s air traffic control tower.
A child’s voice can be heard on a tape making five transmissions to pilots preparing for takeoff on Feb. 17. The recording was obtained by WFXT-TV in Boston.
In one exchange, the child can be heard saying, “JetBlue 171 contact departure.”
A male voice in the tower says: “That’s what you get, guys, when the kids are out of school.”
The child later clears another plane for takeoff, and says, “Adios, amigo.”
The FAA said in a statement: “Pending the outcome of our investigation, the employees involved in this incident are not controlling air traffic.” It added: “This behavior is not acceptable.”
(Copyright 2010 by The Associated Press. All Rights Reserved.)
(via 13WHAM. Emphasis mine.)
Jesus, FAA. What crawled up your butts and died? What could be more adorable than a little kid telling pilots “Adios, amigo!” as they are cleared for takeoff? Hell, I think this should become standard procedure! Let’s get a kid in every tower just for this purpose.
Join my new facebook group: One Kid Per Tower (OKPT).
Snow day?
Nope. Not today.
Last night I stopped at my mom’s house on the way home from work. A little while later my sister-in-law stopped by with the kids. Mom made us homemade pizza and crispella (fried dough, to un-Italian).
While we were eating, I told the kids: “maybe if you’re good tonight you’ll be rewarded with a snow day tomorrow!!!” Then I turned to my SIL and she was shaking her head and shooting me the death stare.
I never want to get to the point in my life where a snow day isn’t something to look forward to with pure anticipation and excitement.
Edit to add: this isn’t meant as a negative commentary about my SIL. This is about my seemingly selfish desire to not have anything in my life that would make me not look forward to a free day off - namely, kids.
I am having a VERY hard time potty training my 3yr old. As it is she is older than my first child was when we potty trained her- 3 is just so damn stubborn! And with my current stress level and lack of patience…argggghhhh. I have a potty chart and fun new underwear, I take her to the potty often-doesn’t matter- she keeps peeing on the floor. Any tips?
Buy a dehumidifier?
I bought a can of mixed nuts today.
jaydensmommie:steelopus:lilykily:
You let Popcorn lick your face and if nothing else, that tongue has had dog food on it. Sometimes the relationship trumps the disgustingness. Just sayin.
Oh come on now. Don’t pretend that dog food isn’t delicious!
I bought a can of mixed nuts today.
…and was eating them while on the Intertubes, when my 2 year old came into where I was sitting. She saw I was eating some peanuts and grabbed a few for herself. After she inhaled a few, she offered me one. And then another. I ate them smack dab right out of her hand. We giggled as I pretended to gobble her fingers up and we delicately shared a moment of love. We look down at the chair and notice a peanut sitting there, all by itself, screaming to be eaten. We both lunge for it. Me, being bigger, smarter and FASTER beat her to it, popped it into my mouth. The little blond mealy scamp started to WHINE about it, do you believe that? So, being the nice Mom that I am, reach into my mouth wipe the half chewed nut OUT of my mouth and PLOP! smeared it right into her outstretched hand. She looked at it, and then at me, and down again. And then she swipes her hand full of the crunchy goodness RIGHT into her mouth. She seems happy. Contented. She swallows.Belly full. Argument averted.
I deserve Mother Of The Year award.
As if I needed any more reasons to not want kids of my own, this story comes along and reassures me that, yes indeed, kids are absolutely disgusting.
I found this on my desk when I came back from Abbott’s & taking pictures.
Three observations:
- My niece and nephews are hilarious.
- I still don’t want to have kids of my own.
- Beans don’t have this effect on me.
Click-through to get the full-size brilliance.
“Dad: Eat your last nugget!
Toddler daughter: No!
Dad: Are you going to eat this nugget or not?
Toddler daughter: No!
Dad: OK! I’m gonna eat it!
Toddler daughter: OK!
Dad: Alright, last chance, are you sure you don’t want it?
Toddler daughter: I no wannit!
Dad: OK say bye!
Dad: *devours the nugget with one bite*
Toddler daughter: *EPIC MELTDOWN*
Toddler daughter: YOU ATE MY NUGGET! :( WAAAAAAAAAAAH!
Toddler daughter: :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :( :(”
