Stephen Lopez
(by Steelopus)
If you haven’t done so already, you should probably go ahead and wish Mary a very happy birthday!
Current status.
There's something wrong with YOUR face!
Asked by jaydensmommie
GPOYW
Mary and I enjoyed some fine dining this evening down at the local Burger King (Jayden’s request).
Weeeeeeeeeeeee (by steelopus)
Posting this one again because it’s hilarious and makes me smile.
You all should know:
That Mary is the kind of friend who will drive over to Wegmans after you get back from lunch to tell you if she thinks the cashier you thought was cute is as young as you fear, and then confirm your fear, and then reassure you and tell you you’re not a creepy old dude even though you feel like you are.
Mary owns one of the coolest tshirts on the planet.
(yellow!)
Formula for awesome photo replies:
- Post pictures of a Crock-Pot® full of food stuffs.
- There is no step 2.
Ceiling Jawa Is Watching You Make Coffee (by Steelopus)
I thought the light reflecting on our hotel room ceiling looked eerily familiar…
*FART YOUR EYEBALL, SHAKE YOUR BOOTY*
I TOLD MY MAMA I WANNA PUT THAT ON MY TUMBLR!! THAT WILL GET ME MORE PERSONS!!
I SAID THEY’RE GONNA FREAK OUT. THEY’RE GONNA FREAK OUT SO BAD, IT WILL GET ME MORE PERSONS.
AND FART YOUR TRUMPET OUT YOUR NOSE!
The only difference between what comes out of Jayden’s mouth and what goes on in my brain is nothing. There is no difference.
POOP BUCKETS INSIDE YOUR TAXI CAMEL!
In honor of Mary’s birthday. (click to embiggen)
See the original and then make your own!
(by steelopus)
Happy birthday, Mary!
You were the first fake internet person that I met in real life, and ever since that day you’ve been doing a good job of helping me come out of my shell and have less anxiety about meeting people. You’re beautiful and smart and incredibly quick-witted and an amazing mom, and even though you make fun of me a lot, I still love you.
STEVE GOT ME A PRESENT AND IT’S AWESOME AND I LIKE IT CUZ IT MAKES NOISE THANKS STEVE!!!
You’re welcome, buddy!
(via steelopus)
Jayden eats pizza ferociously… so just wait till you see what he does to lawyers.
Good luck today, Mary and Jayden. We’re all rooting for you.
(via Steelopus)
Mommy and Jayden
